Rantings of a tired mind.(4)

I'm not very proud of how i'v been lately but i guess at the same time i don't care. I'v completely lost what it takes to be good and that's fine..maybe because i'v been good for too long and maybe i'v realized that there is no hope for anything worthwhile to happen in return. All my life i'v spent every ounce of my energy trying to make others feel special.. nothing ever stopped me from being who i was. Never did i realize what it was doing to me..killing me piece by piece. There is so much anger piled up inside waiting to get out.. literally begging my soul to set it free. There is a commotion filled inside my head,a constant noise that doesn't allow me to be at peace. A loud scream remains tied down in my throat desperate to come to life. There is so much pain. Its there. All the damn time.